thanks doc

I just took code from Dr. Adrian so I could have a searchable Bible tool here....


....so from now on, don't take my word for it....be a Berean.

26 fun words for 2004

anaphylactic
bilious
caucus
depilatory
estrangement
fiduciary
gregariousness
hooligan
interstitial
juxtapose
koto
laud
muster
nuncii
onomatopoeia
pencillated
quinceañera
rounce
smeltery
tintinnabulation
undulating
ventricle
wyandot
xyloid
yearn
zoographical

first tests of '04

from over at Dappled Things...



Find Your Warped Personality
this quiz was made by mysti

and:

What Famous Leader Are You?

and then this one, because I just couldn't stop:

What Classic Movie Are You?

new syndicate

Dean over at Blogs4God told me my old RSS feed wasn't working. So I changed.

Thanks.

so why'd He ask?

Questions to which God Knew the Answers before He Asked


1. To Adam: "Where are you?"


2. To Cain: "Where is Abel your brother?


3. To Jacob: What is your name?


4. To Pharoah: "How long will you refuse to humble yourself before Me?"


5. To Balaam: "Who are these men with you?"


6. To Solomon: "What shall I give you?"


7. To Satan: "Have you considered My servant Job, that there is none like him on the earth, a blameless and upright man, one who fears God and shuns evil?"


8. To Job: "Who is this who darkens counsel by words without knowledge?"


9. To Isaiah: "Whom shall I send, And who will go for Us?"


10. To Peter: "Who do you say I am?"


11. Also to Peter: "Do you love me?"


12. To the Jews, about Lazarus: "Where have they laid him?"


13. To Saul: "Why are you persecuting me?"

There's certainly a sermon here for every question asked, but the simple life lesson is that God never asks a question to which He doesn't already know the answer.

Why does He ask? The possibilities are likely endless. Simple answers are:

• He loves you and wants to talk with you


• He's using a common parental tactic to get you to confess to your mistake or transgression


• He's asking you so you'll give the obvious answer and be in accordance with Him


• He reveals His passion for His children by asking a question rather than making a statement.


• He brings Himself glory by asking a question and then answering it, or even being the answer.

Make no misktake about it....God knows the answers. He doesn't ask because He doesn't know. He doesn't need your help getting to a solution. He asks for your benefit and for His glory. If you find yourself being questioned by God....you can be pretty certain it's not to fill Him in on the details.

turns out saddam really did have some nasty stuff after all

Cam reports that Danish troops have found 36 mortar shells packed with what may be blister gas (designed to weaken infantry by causing skin to break out in painful blisters)...and also astutely surmises that this will be an ongoing issue for years to come.

Important to note: Up to as many as 100 more may be found nearby...which was in road construction. The weapons were 10 years old...but still presumably viable. They were buried...in the middle of nowhere. The weapons were found in plastic bags....and leaking.

The weapons are there...they will be hard to locate, and for the safety of the people of Iraq, its vital that the effort continues in earnest.

A story about Cotter....indirectly

Despite living in Craig, Colorado, at the time, Cotter was born at the Steamboat hospital, 45 miles away. According to this story, the practice is faily commonplace.

For us, the logic was simple. Craig did not offer epidural anesthesia. For us, that was essential. There was no way I was going through that delivery unless I was numb from the chest down.

understatement

The actor who recently portrayed Jesus in Mel Gibson's soon to be released movie, had this to say:

Jim Caviezel
It was uncomfortable up there on that cross.

source: Us Magazine

sung to the tune of beans beans the magical fruit...

A New Mexico youth was suspended from school for bringing anti-fart pills to school.

When Gas-X is made criminals, only criminals will carry Gas-X.

leftovers from the back of the emotional refridgerator

Walter Weckler
Revenge has no more quenching effect on emotions than salt water has on thirst.

eschatologically important

The last dozen-and-a-half^1,000 Ethopian Jews are headed for Israel.

no infants were harmed in the addition of this blog

Crikey! Gator Bites has been added to my blogroll.

the 'big bang' is the explosion of scientific credibility

Take a dose of man's innate desire to understand his origins, multiply it by his own foolish pride, factor this to the Xth generation of implausibility, then divide your result by the rejection of God's Word and again by the denial of God's existence and your result would be this load of space monkey baloney.

when the real world just isn't real enough

Over at Jen's, I've graded the newest competition of reality TV.

new discipleship tool

The Broadman Christian Standard Bible is now available online, fully searchable.

iraq-ed my brain on this one

another c&p special

Interesting facts about Iraq
Just in case you might think of Iraq as "only" an oil rich nation, ruled by an evil dictator for 30 years, whether it has been supporting terrorists or may not be very important, here are a few important facts regarding the important history and roles that this nation has played down through history*

1. The garden of Eden was in Iraq.
2. Mesopotamia which is now Iraq was the cradle of civilization!
3. Noah built the ark in Iraq.
4. The Tower of Babel was in Iraq.
5. Abraham was from Ur, which is in Southern Iraq!
6. Isaac's wife Rebekah is from Nahor which is in Iraq.
7. Jacob met Rachel in Iraq.
8. Jonah preached in Nineveh - which is in Iraq.
9. Assyria which is in Iraq conquered the ten tribes of Israel.
10. Amos cried out in Iraq!
11. Babylon which is in Iraq destroyed Jerusalem.
12. Daniel was in the lion's den in Iraq!
13. The 3 Hebrew children were in the fire in Iraq (and so was their sauna-mate)
14. Belshazzar, the King of Babylon saw the "writing on the wall" in Iraq.
15. Nebuchadnezzar, King of Babylon, carried the Jews captive into Iraq.
16. Ezekiel preached in Iraq.
17. The wise men were from Iraq.
18. Peter preached in Iraq.
19. The "Empire of Man" described in Revelation is called Babylon which was a city in Iraq!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And you have probably seen this one. Israel is the nation most often mentioned in the Bible. But do you know which nation is second? It is Iraq! However, that is not the name that is used in the Bible. The names used in the Bible are Babylon, Land of Shinar, and Mesopotamia.

The word Mesopotamia means between the two rivers, more exactly between the Tigris and Euphrates Rivers. The name Iraq, means country with deep roots. Indeed Iraq is a country with deep roots and is a very significant country in the Bible. Here's why:

* Eden was in Iraq--Genesis 2:10-14
* Adam & Eve were created in Iraq--Genesis 2:7-8
* Satan made his first recorded appearance in Iraq--Genesis 3:1-6
* Nimrod established Babylon & Tower of Babel was built in Iraq--Genesis 10:8-97 & 11:1-4
* The confusion of the languages took place in Iraq--Genesis 11:5-11
* Abraham came from a city in Iraq--Genesis 11:31 & Acts 7:2-4
* Isaac's bride came from Iraq--Genesis 24:3-4 & 10
* Jacob spent 20 years in Iraq--Genesis 27:42-45 & 31:38
* The first world Empire was in Iraq--Daniel 1:1-2 &2:36-38
* The greatest revival in history was in a city in Iraq--Jonah 3
* The events of the book of Esther took place in Iraq--Esther
* The book of Nahum was a prophecy against a city in Iraq--Nahum
* The book or Revelation has prophecies against Babylon, which was the old name for the nation of Iraq--Revelation 17 & 18

No other nation, except Israel, has more history and prophecy associated with it than Iraq.

i'm out of order? you're out of order!

I know you've seen this as many times as have I, but it still made me laugh, so....

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and not published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were actually taking place.

Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July 15th.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.
---------------------------------------------------------
Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
---------------------------------------------------------
Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget? Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?
A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty-five years.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?
A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo or the occult?
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo?
A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
A: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
A: Yes. Q: And what were you doing at that time?
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?
-------------------------------------------------------------
Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?
--------------------------------------------------------
Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male, or a female?
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
A: Oral.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere

not the type of attention i'm craving

in my inbox...at work:

Sick of Men only Looking at the Women with Large Breasts?
You Deserve Attention Too.

As a matter of fact, I am sick of it. I'm sick of it because too men aren't guarding their eyes or respecting women and too few women are pursuing modesty and are disrespecting themselves.

I don't think this what they meant, though.

I have a hunch that I would indeed get people looking at me if I responded to this solicitation.

this is why

The Democratic Frontrunner has proven once again why he is utterly unembracable as a centrist politician.

Howard Dean
"The overwhelming evidence is that there is very significant, substantial genetic component to it," Dean said in an interview Wednesday. "From a religious point of view, if God had thought homosexuality is a sin, he would not have created gay people."

from WSJ BOTW

By this logic, sin does not exist, for God created us all in our fallen state. Malice is not a sin. Murder is not a sin. Lust is not a sin. Pride is not a sin. Avarice, rebellion, prejudice....all simply flavors of distinction in the Divine 31 Shoppe of human creation. Who needs a Savior when there is nothing from which we need to be saved?

May the Lord have mercy on us all.

sfd highlight #1

There are a lot of spiritual lightwights out there praying for heavyweight blessings.

Lord...may you bless me by never giving me new territory until I have been an obedient, adequate steward over the territory with which You have already blessed me.

best intentions

Every time God brings me to a peak in my spiritual adventure, I too often don't invest adequate time sharing the fresh perspective with others. Its really important to me to change that. I literally have pages and pages of material that have blessed only me...and I hope to rectify that in the time ahead through this journal.

As I'm able, I'll be sharing bits of story, statements of truth, and spiritual insights that were shared with me. I hope you'll find value in them, and maybe even a way to apply something to your own life.

where was the rest of this poor fellow?

Dead Man's Dangling Legs Greet Couple

via the WSJ BOTW.

underwhelming

MoveOn.org's "Bush in 30 Seconds" advertisement competition finalists have been posted.

The best of a sorry lot is this one.

Now a "who's who*" of liberal celebrities gets to, like a prize booger stuck painfully to the upper recesses of a nostril, pick a winner.



*Literally, only Jack Black has been a part of anything mildly entertaining in recent history. The rest of them lead you to ask either "who are they?" or "who cares?"

i'll be wearing walmart & old navy

It's time for the 2004 Bloggie Nominations.
If Tony plans well, he can actually attend the festivities.

Please accept my award on my behalf.

doggone incredible

I have shared a story of the return of my childhood pet to my home...over at Jen's.

what.a.day

Isn't if funny when you begin a day with grand designs only to see those designs crumpled like the script of Gigli next to the trashcan at the SAG awards?

That was my day.

My intentions: lock myself in my office, write prolifically on the small group study, and take a huge leap of progress toward advancement in the redesign.

What happened instead:
Came in to a crisis...a pastor in South Carolina was unhappy because he couldn't identify the video clip that corresponded to this month's meeting guide. So, I called him and we worked through that issue.

Not long after that I had to secure hotel arrangements for an upcoming conference, also in South Carolina. Normally, my secretary would do this, but she was putting together packets for said conference.

Amidst those arrangements, Kelli called and said Kelsi really needed to go to the doctor. We could get her in, but I'd need to come home to do it, because Kelli's still sick, and it was only 20 degrees outside today, and someone needed to be home for Kaylyn when school finished for the day.

So, I was at the office for a little less than three hours, and completed none of what I initially intended to accomplish. I drove home, picked up Kelsi and took her to the pediatrician (picked at random at our insurer's web site).

Nice office. Lots of sick kids.

The doc took a quick, but thorough, look at lil' bit, and said, "It's good you brought her in. She's got a virus, the beginning stages of bronchitis. If you hadn't, she'd surely have gotten pneumonia."

Once again, I'm feeling like Dad O' The Year.

So, I brought her home, dropped her off, picked up Cotter, and headed off to the pharmacy, to buy medicine that will supposedly combat this nasty little vermin called mycoplasma.

Since then, I've helped clean two bouts of baby vomit, watched my wife throw up once in response, made two bowls of chicken noodle soup... (mmmm....noodle soup*), play a little game with the two older kids, and fight with Kelsi twice to take this nasty medicine that is supposed to taste like cherry, but I suspect tastes more like nasty-flavored medicine. I'm hoping it possesses some osmosis-type qualities, for the large amounts that have been spit out, soaked in her hair, and run down her neck.

So here I sit, at the end of a long day where I've done nothing that I've expected to do, and all that I need to do still ahead of me. And all I can do is thank God that He has given me the chance to be a dad and a husband -- that He has trusted me to care for others. That He has given me such a love for these people who are my family where their needs come first, and joyfully so. The work that provides my salary is tremendously important to me, but paling in scope and magnitude to the blessing I receive simply by getting to be and do those things that any dad can do, but today I had the honor of doing.



*gratuitous link offered if you can identify this TV quote

i'm just saying

No adult male should own, much less wear, a Mickey Mouse jacket of any variety, no matter what circumstances come into the situation.

dean's mark of revelation

King of Fools has a great post, blogbyting Scrappleface, on the recent error (link requires registration) by Howard "1962 Bible Drill Runner Up" Dean.

WWJD: Where Was Job, Dean?

I just don't think he understands that there is a clear, easy-to-observe line between honoring the the deeply held spiritual sensibilities of the populace and offending them. Dean has certainly crossed that line with careless speech and incongruent policy. It doesn't take a genius to spot a fraud. Bike Path Theology and New Testament Jobs accomplish self-incrimination quite well.

Oh, and as a by-the-way -- you're not going to win over too many people with that "the happy ending of Job was added later"-speech. Tuck this advice away for future reference.

a clintonesque democrat?

At least one candidate appears to have a very dirty mind...

Wesley Clark
"Not everybody's born on a level playing field. You've got to help lift people up and give them a chance, and that's what affirmative action does. And it's not just about race; it's also about sex."

--quoted by the Associated Press, June 5, via WSJ Best O' the Web

do this in 3 sets of 10

From Mikey:

GREAT EXERCISE PROGRAM FOR '04


Here's the exercise program I'm using to stay in shape this year. You might want to take it easy at first, then do it faster as you become more proficient. It may be too strenuous for some.

AS ALWAYS, CONSULT YOUR DOCTOR BEFORE STARTING ANY EXERCISE PROGRAM.

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Okay, that's enough for the first day!

we say little if not egged on by vanity

This headline is a quote by Francois Duc de la Rochefoucauld, and is an great introduction to this email I received by two different people today:

Today is International Day of The Very Good Looking, Beautiful and Attractive People. So send this message to someone you think fits this description. Please do not send it back to me as I have already received over fifty thousand messages and my inbox is jammed.

a discipler has died

Lewis Drummond, former president of the SBC Southeastern Seminary, has returned to his Lord.

u-turn and cough

I had been at work for a little less than two hours (and the news of the barber baptism had circulated before my arrival) when I got the phone call:

Kelli: Hi Huddy
Me: Mr. T, is that you? And why are you calling me from a tunnel?
Kelli: Verwy fuddy...
Me: Oh! I'm sorry Elmer, I confused you for BA Barracus....Have you caught that wascally wabbit yet?
Kelli: That's enub. I'b sick.
Me: Do you need me to come?
Kelli: How buch trubble will you get in?
Me: None...the SFD isn't until Thursday (which I was pleased to discover, because once I showed up, I quickly realized I'd need a couple days to be ready for a SFD...after wading through email, voice mail, snail mail, etc)
Kelli: Thed yes, cub homb.
Me: I'll be right there...I love you.
Kelli: I luboo doo.

Okay, I confess, I said that last "I love you" just to hear her say it back all sickly like that.

Just a note, here, but for Kelli to make this phone call meant that she was the practical analogy to Bad Bad Leroy Brown after his bar fight where he looked like a jigsaw puzzle with a couple of pieces gone (go ahead and sing along if you know the tune). She, unlike me, is tough as nails. So for her to call in reinforcements, it must mean that things were pretty shaky on the nausea front.

Upon hanging up the phone, I instantly changed out of my mild-mannered editor outfit and donned my heroic "Super Hubby" outfit*, stepping triumphantly into the common area and announcing:

"I Must Go Home. My Ailing Wife Is In Need Of My Assistance!" You could hear the pageantry of the trumpets declaring my valor.

On my way home, I determined to stop at the local grocery store for chicken soup, saltines (and unexpectedly, a variety of Christmas items that were 75% off....what can I say, I'm just a bit of a compulsive shopper). As I stood in the checkout line waiting my turn, I thought to myself how can she get so sick so quickly? She was fine at bed time last night...

Little did I know my question would be immediately answered...

Clerk: Hi...how are you?
Me: I'm nice (my standard response). How are you?
Her: (Long Silence)...Wilmingham (I'm not sure that's what she said, but it could have been "we'll meet again" or "He'll bring Spam"...whatever it was, she looked extremely unhappy, which led me to say...)
Me: Well, you don't look very happy to be here.
Her: I feel really nauseous suddenly.
Me: (taking a step back) really?
Her: Everyone in my family has been very sick, but I've been completely healthy...
Me: Until now.
Her: Until now....here's your receipt and change.

Yes, as I put out my hand and received $2.15 and an inevitable assortment of streptococcus virilia, I felt a bit like Ben Stiller in Along Came Polly, playing One on One against the shirtless hairy guy. But I was enlightened to how easily germs are communicated.

Oh yeah, that money was immediately exchanged across the street at Wendy's for a #1 combo with cheese no onions. Happy New Year, Chet in the Drive Thru.

Don't forget...feed a fever and starve a cold...or is it the other way around?



*I really just put on my coat.

sfd

Well, I haven't been to work in over two weeks, and we return tomorrow to a Spiritual Focus Day, where we will revisit the Lead Like Jesus material presented by Ken Blanchard at our last SFD.

I'm really looking forward to it, as a way to get oriented toward a very busy and important next few months, filled with travelling, writing, editing, conferencing, planning, and prayer.

May the Lord bless our efforts as the fruit of promises offered in time of fellowship with and submission to Him, and not of our own effort and endeavors. May those blessings strengthen the man in his marriage, in his family, and in his church.

peer recognition is always nice

In an email from my sister-in-law, Cotter has been described by his older cousin as one who "drips cool."



Why does this make me so proud?


Well, it does.

And I'm not going to apologize for it.

Even if the source is a seven-year-old (who, by the way, is held in equally high regard by my son, although he doesn't possess the vernacular to express it so cleverly).

a coping mechanism

I actually thought this during today's game, in which my beloved Broncos were beat until it was certain they were dead:

hmmm...a colt is a baby bronco. So...in a sense...it's like we're seeing our children do really well. Maybe I can be okay with this....

Despite the power of suggestion, I really wasn't okay "with this."

But, on a related note, I did receive a genuine leather Bronco insignia steering wheel cover, which we used on our trek home. I will soon take it off though, because it will receive too much sun damage if I were to actually continue using it. It will soon become part of the Permanent Collection^®, likely as part of some Driving to the SuperBowl motif that will be unveiled around the time of John Elway's induction into the Pro Football Hall of Fame.

Yes, I am just that sad and pathetic. But I don't wear jerseys, and I've never painted my face.

a domesticated annoyance

You probably could guess this about me, but I slightly loathe it when the adjective Christ is used alone as a noun, implying a surname attachment to its object, which solely is Jesus.

Please, don't use Christ as a casual reference to Jesus, the way you would use McAnally as a second-and-ongoing reference to me after introducing me by full name in an initial statement. If referring to Jesus in your writing, or in any form of communication, refer to Him as Jesus or by the definite article-included the Christ.

Thank you.

well, this is horrible

A seriously troubled woman has the audacity to plead innocent to two counts of murder, in a case where she is accused of killing a pregnant friend, removing the preborn child (in his sixth month of fetal development), and claiming the child was her own, delivered unexpectedly.

This case is significant on several fronts, but most importantly for bringing a focus on the inalienable rights often being stolen from our most needy, dependent, and victimized demographic. I look forward to the day when somebody actually brings legal proceedings on behalf of the preborn, in an action against those who would wantonly violate the civil rights denied to them, through the proliferation of abortion on demand.

blogbyte of the day

Cam Edwards
Maybe this will be the year I get all my hair back... (as opposed to all my back hair).

dean/bin laden 2004

How can ANYONE support this nut?

Howard Dean
"I've resisted pronouncing a sentence before guilt is found. I still have this old-fashioned notion that even with people like Osama, who is very likely to be found guilty, we should do our best not to, in positions of executive power, not to prejudge jury trials. So I'm sure that is the correct sentiment of most Americans, but I do think if you're running for president, or if you are president, it's best to say that the full range of penalties should be available. But it's not so great to prejudge the judicial system."

via Cox & Forkum.

Unless the clear-thinking Democratic populace wrest control of its party from Dean via the primaries, the general election of 2004 will go to show just how out of touch this party is from the heartbeat of America--which beats in no uncertain intolerance toward terror-mongers--by way of a landslide victory for President Bush.

for the record

The national champions already won their bowl game. Tonight's contest is irrelevant.

keep an eye out for this one II

in my inbox:

Partying Husbands

A man left for work one Friday afternoon. But, being pay-day, instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend partying with the boys and spending his entire pay check.

When he finally appeared at home, Sunday night, he was confronted by a very angry wife and was barraged for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions. Finally his wife stopped the nagging and simply said to him.

"How would you like it if you didn't see me for two or three days?"

To which he replied. "That would be fine with me."

Monday went by and he didn't see his wife. Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results. But on Thursday, the swelling went down just enough where he could see her a little out of the corner of his left eye.

so much for plan #2

Authorities in Sweden expect to catch a burgler by the gem he left behind at the crime scene.

keep an eye out for this one

I don't know what's funnier...that this woman stole 50 antique glass eyeballs, or that her surname is Wink.

alas

I blame the coach for this.

my vacation, by the numbers:

4108: miles driven

103.7: high temperature for Kelsi

99.5: high temperature for Kaylyn

98.6: high temperarture for Cotter

49: hours travelling

23: hours of DVD operation while travelling

20: longest time of continual driving (except for potty & meal breaks -- Houston to Denver)

19: times Cotter announced, "I'm not going to ask if we're there yet."

14: games of 7-up 7-down played

13: tanks of gasoline

12: states visited (Georgia, Alabama, Mississippi, Louisiana, Texas, New Mexico, Colorado, Kansas, Missouri, Illinois, Kentucky, Tennessee)

10: species of roadkill identified (elk, deer, antelope, coyote, dog, cat, possum, raccoon, squirrel, armadillo)

6: beds slept in; cousins played with

4: great-grandmothers visited (Mammaw, Grandmother, Grannie Annie, and Grandma Marge); grandparents visited, aunts & uncles visited

3: games of Texas Hold-em played; great-aunts and -uncles visited

2: molars arrived (Kelsi); states unintentionally circumnavigationally avoided (Oklahoma, Arkansas)

1: day to recover

my son gets it

Cotter: Oh....this new toy costs batteries, doesn't it, Daddy?

Me: Yes son, it does....it certainly does.

a sad end to a fairy-tale love affair

Britney's marriage is being annulled. Allegedly.

is sam walton the antichrist?

If he comes back from the grave, you should probably be suspicious.

I pose this rhetorical question because of some angry ex-employees, irate competition, and additional malcontents have posted billboards around the country inviting you to discover, via the Internet, how Wal-Mart is the Devil.

This is all fine, but did you know that they're still slashing prices?

My philosophy is simple. If you aren't happy working there, go somewhere else. If the place, be it Wal-Mart or anywhere else, becomes known for poor business practices, they won't be able to hire people. If they become known as a place that doesn't serve people well because they can't hire the right type of worker, their business will decline.

This is known as the free market. This model works best when participants in a democratic republic actually follow its tenets, rather than yammering for socialistic alternatives.

he'll always be known as ex-husband #1

Britney got married. Allegedly.